In all of the office jobs I've had, ever since my first in college, I never really took lunch breaks:

» Receptionist ('07-'09): Worked 4-5 hour shifts and didn't receive a lunch break.
» Administrative Assistant ('10): Ate at my desk while playing on my computer.
» Front Desk Administrator ('10): Ate at my desk while playing on my computer.
» Payroll Coordinator ('10-'11): Too busy to take a lunch; ate while working.
» Logistics Specialist ('11): Chose to not take a lunch so I could get off an hour early.

When I first started my current role (Executive Assistant, in case you were wondering) I took lunch breaks for the first week or two. I would pack a lunch the night before, to save money, and go into the kitchen to eat it, then I'd spend the rest of the hour playing games on my phone in "The Bill," which is a living-room type of area we have next to the kitchen. However, I never felt it was necessary, and I would have much rather been at my computer messing around, so I stopped after the first couple of weeks - especially once I started Medifast again and literally wasn't eating a lunch at work.

However, lately, I have gotten into the habit of going to the grocery store on my lunch break. Not every day, but most days. My office is conveniently located in the center of four great stores: Sam's Club, ALDI, Jewel-Osco (a Meijer/Walmart type of store), and The Marketplace (a Jewish produce market - the city I work in [Skokie] is a very Jewish heavy area). With the combination of these stores I have been able to bargain shop pretty well for all of the ingredients for the recipes I've been cooking as well as the usual essentials.

Today, while visiting Jewel to pick up a few things, I decided to grab a Diet Coke out of one of the coolers next to the registers. Ironically I ended up walking down the actual pop isle to get to the registers, and in doing so I passed a woman who was grabbing a couple two-liters. This woman was easily at the higher end of 200 pounds (I'd guess around 275 or so). In her arms she had three two-liters of regular pop (Mountain Dew, Dr. Pepper, and Coke, to be specific). Then I glanced over to her cart: cheese puffs, Pop-Tarts, Little Debbie boxes, potato chips, hot dogs, ice cream, frozen pizzas ... no fruits, vegetables, or un-processed food. And there I was, with my hand-held basket containing two heads of lettuce, a tiny jar of reduced-fat peanut butter (to put on my Medifast brownies!), and a package of boneless, skinless chicken breast. Then I started thinking...

What if this woman was skinny? Would I have judged her? We all do it. We see a large man or woman with junk food and think, "You probably don't need to be buying that," or "Hmm, that's probably how you got the way you are." It's not that we are trying to be cruel or heartless - hey, most of us doing the judging could stand to lose a few pounds too - it's just a natural thought that comes to mind, whether or not we'd like to admit it. But if this woman was thin, would the contents of her cart even stick in my mind? Would I think to myself, "She's probably throwing a party," or, "Maybe she's shopping for an overweight relative," or would I just pass her and go grab my Diet Coke without even a second thought? Then I thought some more...

What if this woman was the same size as she is now, but her cart was filled with fruit, vegetables, lean proteins, whole grains, and low-fat dairy? Would I have judged her? Again, we all do it. We see a large man or woman with a cart full of healthy food and think, "You obviously haven't been eating like that very long," or, "Did you walk off with someone else's cart by mistake?" Again, it's not that we are trying to be cruel or heartless, it's just a natural thought that comes to mind, whether or not we'd like to admit it.

The reality is, a skinny person can buy whatever they want and no one thinks anything of it. If it's junk food we assume it's for a party, and if it's healthy food we congratulate them on their good habits. But no matter what an overweight person is purchasing, some judgement is made. If it's junk food we snark and accuse them of not caring about their health, and if it's healthy food we snark and accuse them of being a health-wannabe. Then I thought one last time...

Maybe what the junk-food-filled cart of an overweight person, like the woman at Jewel today, says about them is, "What difference does it make what I buy, you'll judge me no matter what. And a fat person buying junk food is more expected, and therefore less embarrassing." How many overweight people out there are still overweight because they don't want to be pinned as a health-wannabe? Do I think this is a valid excuse? No, of course not. It shouldn't matter what other people think about you - your health matters more. But then again, I am a person with a strong will and sense of self, and also someone with high confidence. Maybe that woman isn't like me, and her cart is simply saying, "I give up."